The Help, Post # 4: A Daughter's Worst Nightmare

Although it is one of the less prominent themes of the novel, I definitely think body image is a part of Kathryn Stockett's novel, The Help, that can not go unnoticed. It is certainly not the central issue for the character of Skeeter in the novel, but there is an obvious reoccurring theme of Skeeter beating up on herself for not being the most attractive girl out of her friends. And the spark that ignites this insecurity in her is her own mother. Skeeter's mom is constantly pushing the ideas that she needs to fit the stereotypical expectations of the girls in their town. Her mom tells her that she is too tall and awkward looking. Her mom pours chemicals onto her hair that even start to make her scalp burn in an attempt to flatten out her curly locks. She is constantly nagging her daughter about not being married while the rest of her friends are. She discourages her daughter from writing for the local newspaper and focuses more on her daughter's lack of a love life than her true interests in life. The problem that is presented in this aspect of the book is one that is very prevalent in our modern society, even more than in that day and age. I think this issue is one that many girls around Skeeter's age and younger face. The pressures put on them by parents, friends, peers, the media, and their own minds, tell them that it is not acceptable to have any appearance that falls outside of the parameters of perfection. It is this pressure to look perfect that causes girls to develop eating disorders, self destructive behavior, depression, or to even bully other girls for not fitting the stereotypical look that is expected of them. Skeeter's mom was the force pushing her to "perfect" her looks and "fix" her flaws because she didn't believe that her daughter would ever find a husband if she looked so out of the ordinary. Skeeter was tall and gangly with immensely frizzy and curly hair and she was not what would be considered a beauty queen, but she was still a lovely young lady. More importantly, she was one of the most intelligent, kind hearted, and determined women in her town, yet that detail always seemed to get ignored by the other girls around her. This unhealthy obsession about looks outweighed the importance of brains or heart. This is a flaw that our society still faces. Unfortunately, the way to combat this issue is to convince people to believe in themselves and to not take the judgments of others to heart. This is obviously easier said than done, but it starts with each individual telling themselves that it is the inside that counts and that they ARE enough; that they don't have to change anything about themselves in order to find happiness in life. I hope that one day our society can learn to think in those terms, though I question if it can every truely be a reality as long as it continues to come from girls own mothers. Skeeter's mom was the one telling her she was never enough and had to alter her looks to find love. That is the most damaging thing a mother can tell her daughter and perhaps the most flawed part of mother-daughter relationships in our society today.